Word up HOMIEZ, HONIEZ, and all Y'ALL FAGGOTY HOMOZ who be CHEKKIN THIS
SHIT LIKE A MUTHAFUKKA!!! Afta gettin MO THAN ONE EMAIL about writin
sum mo shit, all I be gottin ta say iz FUKK Y'ALL, I be do am fo WRITIN
WHEN I BE WANTIN!!! But OK, I be writin now, DAWG!!!
Brad Paisley, "Mud on the Tires"
Yo, this be a REAL LETDOWN AND SHIT!!! I be think this be a bunch
of jokez like dat one "IF THEY MUD ON DA TIREZ, TAKE DA RED RIVA, BUNSON
BURNA"!!! Awwwwwwwww, yeah dat shit be SUM FUNNY ASS SHIT AND SHIT!!!
Instead it be a bunch of COUNTRY SONGS LIKE "MY DAWG BE A DAWG, DAWG, SO
GET IN MY PIKKUP TRUCK AND SHIT"!!! Who da fukk want dat when they
can get my latest MONSTA JAM, "PIKKIN UP HOZ IN MY TRIKKED OUT HONDA CIVIC"!!!
Guaranteed ta sell AT LEAST EIGHT COPIEZ!!! Dat be eight mo THAN
BART PANSY, FO SHO!!!
Nevermore, "Enemies of Reality"
BLARRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!! RAPE YO GOATZ AND DRINK DA CHIPMUNK BLOOD
AND KILL YO PARENTZ AND TAP DA BOOTY FRUM DA BAKK!!! Dat last partz
my OWN IDEA, which y'all can see be makin me DA MASTA INVENTOR O DA CENTURY,
WORD!!!
Junior Senior, "D-D-Don't Don't Stop the Beat"
DA FUKK BE THIS SHIT, SNUFFY SMITH??? He be all like STUTTERICATIN
AND SHIT!!! He be like like dat dood from BARKMAN TURNER OVERLORD
who be singin dat FAGGOT SHIT "b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-baby y'all aint SEEN NO
M-M-M-M-M-M-MUTHAFUKKIN SHIT YET, BITCH"!!! Otha than dat, it just
be ANUTHA IN DA STEADY STREAM O HOT MONEY WANNABEEZ!!! Pass on it
and GO FO DA REAL THING, YO!!!
Laura Turner, "Soul Deep"
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww YEAH!!! Unless y'all be a FAGGOT PUMP,
this shit haz GOTZ TA BE TURNIN Y'ALL ON LIKE A BITCH!!! I be tellin
y'all thiz, I BE HITTIN IT FRUM DA BAKK AND IT BE HITTIN HER SOLE IT BE
GOIN SO DEEP, STRAIGHT UP!!! This be a GOOD CD cuz da bitch be wearin
a dress dat haz EAZY ACCESS TA DA BOOTY CAGE!!! Chek out thoze HOLEZ
IN DAT MUG, LESTA!!! A HIT FO SHO!!!
Bitch smakkin a HO, it be...
DJ Hot Money Smooth Mo Dee Daddy Ice Papa Smurf's FUNKY HOT SUPAFLY
FLASHBACK HIT FAVORITE, YO!
Eddie Murphy, "How it Could Be"
I be tellin y'all how it could be... DA BEST CD IN THIS BITCH!!!
This be da one wit da hit Y'ALL BE REMEMBERIN,
"MY BITCH BE PARTYIN LIKE A MUTHAFUKKA"!!! Dat wuz sum CLASSY SHIT
cuz ut be PULLIN ON DA HEART ROPEZ, PEACE!!! I think it be produced
by sum nobody like RICK SCHRODER O SUM SHIT, but who be carin about dat
unless it be DA SLICK HOT MONEY PRODUCTICATIONZ!!! A KEEPA FO SHO!!!
Prince, "News"
Yeah, it be NEWZ AI'IGHT, PIRNCE!!! Newz ta da world DAT Y'ALL
AINT BE DEAD AFTA ALL LIKE EVERYONE THOUGHT Y'ALL WUZ!!! Y'all shoulda
KILLED YOSELF afta dat GREAT DVD "UNDA DA CHERRY PIE" cuz we all know DAT
WUZ DA BEST Y'ALL WILL EVA BE, and dat wuz THIRTY YEARZ AGO, DAWG!!!
Pat Benetar, "Go"
Speakin o THIRTY YEARZ AGO, datz when this HOT NEW SINGA WUZ BORN, JUNEBUG!!!
She be just anutha one o thoze HOT YOUNG BITCHEZ like BRITTNY FOX and MINDY
MORE who cant be singin but SHO CAN LET DA HOT MONEY LOVE STATION HIT IT
FRUM DA BAKK!!!
Martin Barre, "Stage Left"
..."AND SO DID DA AUDIENCE, WORD UP"!!!
And now a SNEAKY PEEK fo next WEEKY WEEK:
Kenny Loggins, "It's About Time"
YEAH, KEVIN, it be about time dat we BURY YO ASS!!! Wait a second,
didnt dat otha DEAD DOOD FROM DA FIFTEEZ STEEV WOODWIND just be puttin
out a CD wit da SAME NAME??? Maybe it be da SAME PERSON!!!
They both SUKK FAGGOT ASS, and they both be DEAD FO TEN YEARZ NOW!!!
I be solvin da crime like ENCYCOLPENIS BRAWN!!!
Aint SHIT worth buyin this TIME AROUND DA CUCKOO CLOCK, but duz dat
really be SURPRISIN Y'ALL, WORD??? It betta not do am fo BE BEIN,
since y'all be knowin dat DA HOT MONEY BE DA WAY O DA FUTCHA AND SHIT,
YO!!!
- DJ HOT MONEY OUT!
Be sure to check out DJ
Hot Money Smooth Mo Dee Daddy Ice Papa Smurf's website. He's
assured us that it's "supa fine like Boone's Farm wine."
