Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, AND MUTHAFUKKIN YO!!!  I be back in DA HOUSE ta give y'all DA INSIDE SCOOP on da latest NEW RELEASEZ!!!  I hope y'all been havin a FLY ASS MAMMORIAL DAY AND SHIT!!!  Of course, there be NO REST fo me, I be havin ta do my SOLD OUT SHOW down in da SUBWAY TERMINAL!!!  Everybody who hearz me, HAS TA BUY A TICKET!!!  I iz always thinkin like that, DAWG!!!

What be up wit DIS MUG???  Sum DOCTA EVIL lookin foo be tryin ta RELEASE MUZIC???  I cant even be figurin out why it BE CALLED NINETEEN, FLAPPY!!!  Dat Mobly cat DONT BE EIGHTEEN, he sho haznt put out no EIGHTEEN CDZ, it just DONT MAKE NO SENSE!!!  Betta call in DETECTIVE GIZMO ON THIS ONE!!!  Maybe he can solve da case of DA SHITTY MUZIC DATZ ON DA CD TOO!!!

STRAIGHT UP, I be seein a little MISPRINT ON DAT COVA, SIMON!!!  It should say "YO, WE INVENTED DA IDEA TA BE STEALIN DA IDEA FO DA REMIX FROM DJ HOT MONEY, OUR IDOL AND SHIT!!!"  Who da fuk this cat think he BE FOOLIN???

Yo, when I be gettin my SUPA ADVANCE COPIEZ o this album, I be thinkin dat someone CUT OFF DA SIDE OF DA COVA!!!  It be suppozed ta say "NOW AGAIN, MO FAGGOT SHIT FROM US GAY MEN OF FAGGOT STATUS!!!"  Datz what I be readin in DA MAGAZINEZ ANYWAY!!!  Of course, wit these guyz, they be called FAGAZINEZ!!!  I be CRACKIN MYSELF UP SUMTIMEZ!!!

Now HERE be a dude who be knowin HOW TA NAME HIZ CDZ, PEACE!!!  BYRON FAGGOT be callin hiz CD "FRANTTIK" becuz when y'all be listnin to it, Y'ALL IZ FRENTIC TA THROW YO SPEAKAZ OUT DA WINDOW!!!  Thankz, RYAN!!!

SWINGIN ON A VINE, here comez...

Heavy D be one of them FAT ASS MUTHAFUKKAZ dat all da NEW STYLE CHUMPZ be wantin ta imitate WHEN DEY NOT IMITATIN ME!!!  He even got shot IN DA BELLY TWENTY TIMEZ like dat PLAYA HATA NOCTURNIUS P.I.G.!!!  Cept Heavy D just be havin DA BULLETZ BOUNCE OFF HIM cuz he be SO FAT!!!  DAT SHIT WUZ TIGHT, WORD!!!  Hiz song "I'm Getting Paid" wuz all about SHOOTIN WHITIEZ and da othz classic "Moneyearnin' Mount Vernon" wuz obviously ripped off from MY SUPA HIT SINGLE "BITCH STEALIN IN NEW ZEALAND" and I got DA LETTAZ TA PROVE IT!!!

Datz right, Y'ALL BE GOTTIN IT, DA WORST MUZIC ON DA PLANET!!!  Da only thing good about this CD ba da song "I STILL WANT TA BE BEIN YO MAN" which wuz dedicated to SNOOP FROGGY FROG, da STEALIN RAPPA WANNABE!!!  Da turth BE OUT THERE, SCULDER!!!

What mo can be said otha than A TRUE GENIUS wit PHAT BEATZ and FRESH GROOVEZ who iz loved by HOMIEZ and HONIEZ EVERYWHERE!!!  EMMANIM be A LEGEND IN HIZ TIME, RIDE DA WAVE!!!

Y'all be GOTTIN DAT SHIT RIGHT!!!  When da CD be playin, y'all wanna be ANYWHERE BUT HERE!!!  In case y'all cant be deciphrin MY UNIQUE STYLE, dat meanz DIS SHIT SUKKZ!!!

Herez a SNEAKY PEEK fo next WEEKY WEEK:

It be ABOUT TIME dat we got ta da BOOTY HO IN THIS WEEKZ COUNTDOWN, SKIPPA!!!  I dont be knowin how ta BE PRONOUNCIATIN DAT NAME, but this bitch BE SUPA FINE!!!  And she only be 19 O SUMTHIN!!!  Awwww yeah, dat meanz she aint TOO UZED UP YET!!!  She will be WHEN I GET THROUGH WIT HER THOUGH!!!  I be like, "YO AMBER (datz what I be callin her since no one can say dat silly name of herz), y'all be wanin ta LET GO YET???"  And she be like "NO WAY HOT MONEY, I WANTZ TA KEEP HOLDIN ON TA DA YARDSTICK BETWEEN YO LEGZ!!!"  Then I be bootin her ass out da do ta make room FO MO HONIEZ!!!  I CANT BE TIED DOWN, ANNA, STOP ASKIN!!!

So dat be dat fo THIS WEEK!!!  Az uzual, DA MUZIC BE SHIT, but at least y'all be knowin BEFO YA BUY, since aint nun o this stuff IN STOZ YET!!!  YO WELCUM!!!

- DJ HOT MONEY OUT!

Be sure to check out DJ Hot Money Smooth Mo Dee Daddy Ice Papa Smurf's website.  He's assured us that it's "supa fine like Boone's Farm wine."