If you are reading this, chances are that you are a computer geek.  If you are a computer geek, chances are that you are a nice guy, but a little bit shy when it comes to women.  You probably like to go to parties, pubs, and nightclubs but feel a little bit out of place.

If a girl starts talking to you, you generally do OK, but its hard for you both start up a conversation or know when to kiss her.

Fear not!  I am looking out for you, and will now let you in on the secrets of the trade.

Works best at:  parties and pubs.
Degree of difficulty:  hard
Degree of alcohol needed:  medium
Degree of alcohol needed for her:  higher the better

This is the most common, and the hardest.  Walking up to a girl you don't know and trying to initiate conversation is pretty hard, so it works best if you know her before hand.  The perfect girl would be someone you know from primary school, or high school as you have the opening lines all sorted.  I can't really tell you what to do on this one, it's whatever you feel comfortable with.  Maintaining a aura of detached interest helps.

Pros:  Can lead to more then a one night thing, not too embarrassing if it fails.
Cons: Very hard to achieve and is time consuming.

Works best at:  parties and pubs
Degree of difficulty:  medium
Degree of alcohol needed:  high
Degree of alcohol need for her:  higher the better

You and a friend of yours walking up to a girl and starting conversation up works a treat.  First of all, if she isn't interested you can pretend that it doesn't bother you and just talk amongst your friend.  Second of all, if it is awkward you two can carry the conversation.  Third of all, you can set each other up for jokes, or even use routines to make yourself seem funnier.  Also, it tends to help if you overwhelm a girl rather then give her a chance to think about what's going on.

Pros:  No chance at making a fool of yourself, can be enjoyable and lead to funny stories the next morning, good for beginners.
Cons: Requires two people, bad for experts.

Works best at:  anywhere
Degree of difficulty:  hardest to do right, but if done it works a treat
Degree of alcohol needed:  low
Degree of alcohol needed for her:  medium

Ah, my personal favorite.  Note that for this you will need a good female friend, who doesn't mind making a fool of herself for your benefit.  What you have to do is pretend that you don't know your female friend, and get her to walk up to you, touch you everywhere, try to kiss you and generally be a flirt.  Then walk up to your target and say something like "look, this girl wont leave me alone, can you protect me for a bit until she goes away."  Your female friend should keep bothering you at intervals, time enough to be alone but time enough to do something:  "pretend we are dancing" and "hug me quick" are great build ups.  Eventually come to the conclusion that you are going to have to kiss your target to get rid of your friend.  The hotter your female friend is the better, because the target will think that you are ignoring the real hot chick and would rather be with her (the target).

Pros:  High rate of success
Cons: If you want more then a one night thing, she will have to meet the chick eventually.  Hard to find females willing to do this.

Works best at:  Nightclubs
Degree of difficulty:  High
Degree of alcohol needed:  High
Degree of alcohol needed for her:  High

This one is fairly simple and works best of people you don't know.  Perfect for the man clubbing by himself - all you have to do is look at a girl for less then 10 seconds then pash her.  If she doesn't respond you can act drunk and, well no harm really.   After you have kissed her it is best to leave her for a while, then come back to her after half an hour or so.  This way if she isn't grossed out you know that you have a good shot at getting more.  This technique is surprisingly effective--it probably has the lowest percentage of working (except maybe the "standard") but has the greatest numbers of success.

Pros:  Works well, can do it on multiple people in a short time span.
Cons:  Feel like you are taking advantage of them, and you will look stupid if it doesn't work.  Prone to getting punched.

Works best at:  Anywhere
Degree of difficulty:  Medium
Degree of alcohol needed:  Low to Medium
Degree of alcohol needed for her:  Doesn't matter

Much like the good cop/bad cop routine, this was invented by two Toms.  Basically for this you will need a friend.  The advantages of this is that you will never know who will pick up.  "Bad Tom" needs to come up to a chick and sleaze all over, after a minute or two "Good Tom" will come over and tell "Bad Tom" to leave her alone.  "Good Tom" can then talk to her and strike up a conversation, also appearing like the hero.  If this doesn't work he can apologize for his friend then leave, where "Bad Tom" can come over again and start up the same thing.  If the girl is drunk and/or a slut, "Bad Tom" will pick up first, but if she isn't, then "Good Tom" has the best chance.

Pros:  Works well, either of you can pick up
Cons:  Hard to do when girl is in a group, "Bad Tom" might get a punch in the eye off another guy.

Well that's all my knowledge expended, if any of you know more email me.

Happy Hunting!

- Kung Fu